The Debt
by Oralya Garza Ueberroth

I especially miss you today.
There is no particular reason —
it's no one's birthday, no special occasion of any kind.
I just thought I'd tell you that.

I'm doing it again —
making mistakes - doing everything wrong,
I know this —
even without you here to point it out.
I can see how you were right,
but I can't remember the solutions.
So much has passed into failing memory.
It's frightening to think you might be fading for me.

There is so much of you, of us, that I've forgotten —
I'd forgotten,
even with you here.

I see you now as I saw you in the beginning —
when I stood at the new moon ponds and the wish was made,
long before bottles and babies and all of the things that love demanded.

Nobody knows this — you do, I suspect, but no one else...
I felt you calling to me.
When you needed me, and I wasn't there — I felt you.
You called, and I pushed it to the back of my mind,
and even though everyone says there was nothing I could have done —
I could have been with you.
I owed you that.

Oralya Garza Ueberroth is the mother of two remarkable children, writes poetry, music, fantasy, fiction, articles, memoirs, complaints, and strategic shopping lists. Read more of her work at www.authorsden.com.